status : focusing on myself =|
i want to be perfect. yet all i can do is to sob. lament me! argh!
hayy.. i haven't applied yet =/ i'm enjoying the air of a tempo bum muna. uwaw! that is so gaaaay! fuckingly-monstrous, i'm almost playing dead.
not like my cm's dadeh and mameh. both of them were really living. busy working, indeed.
ayos nga eh, dadeh is a call boy na. guess why?! he's working in a call center kasi.. *grin* hahahaha. makapag call girl nga rin. lol.
i've been missing everything and everyone lately. and yea, puro boys yon.
just got this bitterly-sweet idea after watching 'just friends'.. omg, Chris Klein is sooo likable now. having that charm of freddie prinze jr. would sure hit it. *grin* darning hoooot! try it guys and girls. before it'll be overrated. like ***-es. you get it? uwaw! you are soooo damn bright! yikkeee!
link @ http://jed-i.blogspot.com for your rawrs with self-hug.
have a great night!
+ a lss of "pero mahal kita wala ng hahanapin pang iba.. handa akong mag tiis kahit na away away away na 'to!" (that's the chorus part. pero ayos din ung bridge with the same chords ng torete... pero ang pinaka, ung last effect. isa pang whoopsie!)
went to church alone. as is na yon, i'm single eh.
mom told me to go to church even without that someone (or merely 'someone'). i know.. i know.. and i have to, really.. and so i did. i have to thank God for all those blessings (..and counting! oh yea!).
and guess who was seated beside me? count 1 to 3 and start now! haha.. ok, stop! it's Jeison. one of my ex-es with the duplicated-yael's-image-and-voice. yay! pa-epal siya most of the time. but this time is different. DINEDMA ko siya. uwaw! i'm really changing. *smugs* and i'm lovin' it. who wouldn't? that's the right way to snob and reject the come back of yesterday's. soooo righteous of me baby! though i miss having a real 'karir'.
*freakingly pissed*
mind says, "it's difficult".
heart says, "it's breaking".
and i say, "I SHOULD".
i'll stay "single" as is
(with 'karirs' naman yon eh!)
argh. soo seemingly got my own mall tour for 3 days (except yesterday).
*much laughs and angst* wala akong nabibiling gusto ko para sa sarili ko eh. gawwddd.. next time, i won't be mall-ing with some other seniors *shuttts* mom and dad and lola (and joan and jam) is wayyyy tooo goooood and betterrrr and lovelllllllyyy to mallhop.. *smiles*
i'm missing my kurtofski (with all his 'banat lines' and whatnots). i'm missing jed as well (oooh! the polar bear hug in every nightly gig). pati si jesse, and trix, and the sc boys (esp yellybelly and sir y).. yay! i really need to go out and be with them again..... and that is ..... SOON!
punish me for not going this month. hmft! i promise to exist as march ends.
after having my photos transferred here, i posted it on my friendster acc immediately for the public's itch, together with captions.
nothing's harsh.
nothing's evil.
i wrote it justly, reasonably, honestly.
"good old days will remain as heart learns.. promised or not, it will."
..with the nicest smile i ever did that night, i never thought of having this kind of come back..
"i do not remember days, i remember moments."
WOW! that's a hella fine answer to hit me through.
feel like ranting now.
much sob and i can't take it longer.
i'm hating you.
seemingly a real hate that is soon to impart.
We lost break twice and I am one lucky fuck to live and be productive with that curse of love and life. I told Kurtofski about all those. Funny how it happened, funny how things happen as is.
This is just another angry day to live by... and why is that?
I'm lacking the initiative now.
I can't break the news of love-ass materials, even what is real.
Plus, I'm starting to hate some people really bad.
Swear I do.
Fucktards! I need a self hug.
=/
I sooo learned a lot about life and you...
it's 2 am and i'm done with our user's manual. i'll be sleeping in a while.. wishing next that it'll be forever
'nakakainis ka eh!'
i'll keep this entry simple and straight.
ayos na sana ang lahat eh.
- my project and take home exam in compiler are both signed by our prof.
- my report in phil consti passed with flying remarks (that is to be presented until friday).
- i'm 4 hours early for our config exam in cisco.
so yea. that was heartening. pero fuckshit! ZERO kami sa config exam. wowwwww eh! know why? one of my groupmates took that exam with her notes. and yes, our group failed because of her idiocy.
'alam mo nahihiya ako sa'yo.. nadamay ka pa. graduating ka pa naman'
'ok lang. bakit naman kasi gumamit pa siya ng notes.. nasasagot ko naman yung mga tanong niya diba?'
'sorry talaga'
damnnn.. i don't deserve that eh. ano ba! fuckining config lang yon! i don't deserve that group. i don't deserve that grade. config yon eh.. my desired subject above all tomes.
'tangina kung d lang ako papasa d2 sa exam sana d na ko nag Com Sci'
'oo nga. sna nag IM o kaya nag IT na lang tayo'
'oi hindi na! magcacaregiver na lang ako... 9months? with certificate.. hahaha fuckshit yon'
but ok, tropa ko yung prof and she told me to retake the config exam tomorrow morning. yea thanks. i need that shit eh.
much of that darniest, my exes and crushes were also there. even bart.
what happened just happened..
gaguhan.
barahan.
asaran.
same as is. nakakasawa.
bart: 'uubusin pa ba kayong mga com sci?'
mhai: 'oo. mas mahalaga kasi kami sa inyo eh'
bart: 'o anong nangyari sa exam niyo?'
mhai: 'tigilan mo ko!'
bart: 'suplada mo ah'
mhai: 'mukha kang tanga ah, buong araw ka na nag-aantay jan'
bart: 'oo nga eh. ikaw rin naman. haha.'
mhai: 'edi umuwi ka na. magyosi ka na lang'
bart: 'kanina pa nga eh. tara yosi'
mhai: 'o sige. bye.'
bart: 'hahaha.. marunong ka ba sa cabling?'
mhai: 'oo naman. palagay mo sakin?'
bart: 'yabang. turuan mo ko.'
mhai: 'haha. wag na. hayaan na lang kita bumagsak.'
bart: 'ganon?'
mhai: 'yea.. dun na nga ako. nakakatamad dito. walang matinong kausap.'
bart: 'oo nga eh. wala ngang matinong kausap.'
mhai: 'tsk. sige na.'
bart: 'huy mamaya na. stay ka muna dito...'
mhai: 'oi, i'm going home na'
bart: 'ok. ingat'
mhai: 'hug?'
bart: *giving a hug*
mhai: 'joke lang yon pards. naniwala ka?'
bart: 'mga trip mo nanaman noh'
mhai: *grin*
stoooooooory. lol. wala naman yan eh. harking back lang so i wrote it as well. masaya kasing makipag-gaguhan (not literally). pero, it's almost fading now. really.
